A Letter of Truth

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This past full moon was a pivotal one for me. I found myself in the space of not wanting any contact with anything that wasn’t in direct connection to my personal life. I was ready to unplug and retreat for a few days. Before the full moon, I had been feeling this heavily, but I ignored it as much as could until I couldn’t anymore.

With me experiencing huge life transitions, growing and evolving every day, there was nudging at me to starve the part of me that got excited to dive into social media every day when I had the time. There was something that screamed; there had to be more to life than social feeds. There was something within in me that had grown tired of aimlessly scrolling social media, clicking on stories and being overly connected to experiences that were not my own.

I needed a break. I need to disconnect and find what felt right to me before all of this. A few years ago I made an important decision about my life. I had spent many years of my life building an online presence through my blog content, books, and digital work. At some point, I decided to begin working toward building a career that was sustainable offline. This, I felt was the most significant decision I had ever made. I no longer wanted to live with the idea that for my business to be successful, I had to be connected or maintaining an online presence 24/7. I would be lying if I said it hasn’t been draining mentally, emotionally and physically. I had long ago grown tired of it all.

At some point, you grow tired of being readily accessible to the outside world. This has been the space I had been sitting in for a while but didn’t know how to deal. Truthfully, my constant connection to my social feeds was a distraction. I couldn’t commit to things long-term. I had difficulty staying focused when I was working because I always felt like there was something I was missing. It was a weird obsession with being engulfed in my social feed all the time.

It’s interesting how a single app or multiple apps hold such power over us. The desire to continuously be connected to the world outside of you can drown out our own individuality, creating the false notion that your attachment to the outside world is necessary for survival. My desire to thrive in love, peace, and distraction free is what’s helped me to connect with breaking this vicious cycle.

It’s hard when you’ve built a career where your followers depend on your post. But if I can be brutally honest, preserving my peace and a sense of privacy has been far more important to me these days. I am a few weeks shy of turning thirty, and I am adamant about setting a positive tone for my life as I walk into this new chapter.

As confident as I am, I do have moments where I experience lows. I have moments of doubt, negativity, fear, discomfort from growth, etc. I am human, and like the rest of the world, I experience an array of emotions as I continue to evolve. It was a pivotal moment in my life when I was able to acknowledge and accept that social media has heightened these feelings or made them worse in many cases.

Give yourself the space to roam free from the shit you thought you need. Allow yourself to disconnect from the world outside of you with the intent to reconnect with what is within. The world doesn’t need access to you 24/7. And you do not need access to the world outside of you 24/7 to feel alive and as if you’re thriving.

It is the beautiful moments of love, freedom, and aloneness that give me my greatest high. It is the moments where I am completely enveloped in the present too much to care if I ever capture the moment for the world to see. Just because it isn’t exposed to the world doesn’t mean it isn’t there, doesn’t exist or is invalid. Through the art of unplugging I broke up with the desire to continually share all of me, all the damn time. I am floating freely, peacefully, something that money can’t buy and a social following could never validate.

Love and LifeAmber Janae