Dealing with The Emotional Side of A Job Loss
I had a friend who reached out to me and was devastated that she had been laid off from her job after almost 8 years with the company. As a friend, it was my job to be there and comfort her but I also couldn't help but think how nothing in the world prepares us for these moments. There is no handbook that tells you how to deal with the emotional side of job loss. We kind of just handle it by feeling anyway we want to feel. At times those feeling consist of thinking irrationally and not making well thought-out, emotionally healthy decisions. There are a few things people don’t tell you when you lose your job, like for instance, you’re going to spend an excessive amount of time crying wondering why.
Your support system will be minuscule if you even have one at all. Most importantly, you’ll spend a lot of time overly stressed about losing a job that it was probably time for you to move on from, to begin with. We often don’t look at losses in this way. We think “Holy, sh*t. I am unemployed, unsuccessful and won’t be able to survive.” We rarely look at the loss as our chance to focus on ourselves and see the beauty in being separated from a job. Often times we have to be forced into removing ourselves from a particular position because if we could, we would remain stuck in the same place forever. The truth is, change is needed in order to develop to new levels. The closing of one door does not mean that it is the end of the world for you. It just means that you have to work a little bit harder in trusting your life’s process and the changes that occur throughout it. Here are a few unemployment survival tips.
Focusing on the Problem Doesn’t Bring a Solution
You’re out of work, that’s evident, but always dwelling on the loss of the job won’t bring it back nor will it bring you a new one. Nobody has ever successfully overcome any obstacle by focusing on the barrier itself. The greatest way to achieve success when facing adversity is to be completely confident in the turnaround of your situation. Stop focusing on what has occurred and started focusing on the present.
Use Your Downtime to Reconnect with Yourself
Most of us have jobs/careers that keep us completely disconnected from ourselves and our personal lives. The first thing to consider when out of work is utilizing the time to reconnect with yourself. We spend so much of our days pouring our lives into trying to keep someone else's business afloat that we neglect ourselves. Being unemployed can offer you the chance to rediscover who you are, what you truly love and where you desire to go next in life. Take advantage of the opportunity to have time to rediscover yourself.
Write or Talk Out Your Emotions
You’re going to feel it. You’re going to go through a series of emotions. All of this is going to derive from fear. You fear not being able to survive. You fear losing everything that you already have. You fear going bat sh*t crazy from being flat out broke. The important thing to remember is, for as long as you give fear power over you, it will control you. Don’t let it. Choose to be happy anyway. Write down your feelings or talk them out with people(s) you trust. You have to be vocal about your sufferings so that you’re not harboring that negativity internally. Let go and release!
Always Dissect the Negative Situation to Discover the Positive
There is a positive in every situation. There is always a silver lining, and if you have trouble seeking the positive, you’re refusing to not see it. You're resisting the positive by remaining attached to the outcome. The ability to be able to see the beauty in every situation is such a blessing. Think about all the lessons you were taught during the time you were employed at your last place of employment. Think of all the things you experienced and how those experiences can help you to evolve. Always seek the active.
Rethink, Reevaluate, Redirect
Sometimes we’re pushed in an alternative direction because it helps to put a fire under us to complete something that we’ve been dreaming of doing but having a full-time job has held us back from that. What is your passion? What is your purpose? Rethink and reevaluate life before you consider going back into the same field you were previously in. Maybe this painful separation was your push toward a redirection. Always consider what you could be doing or building after a job loss. Your job loss may be a higher calling to invest your time into something that feeds your soul a little more than what you've been doing in the past. :-)
Photo Cred: @eriktanner
Be Inspired. Be Encouraged. Be Blessed.